Floundering Through Life & #SpreadTheKindness Link Up #72

I have been floundering through life lately. For months now. And I have been trying to put my finger on the reason. It is a bit out of character for me to be so discombobulated. So I did a lot of soul searching the past few days. I was about to take a nice long blogging break but then decided that my blog is my outlet for processing the things that weigh heavy on my soul. So no break for me. Except a short one next weekend for my brother-in-law’s wedding.

I had every intention of sharing a true #SpreadTheKindness post about my dear friend Carol Tsacoyeanes and her inspiring journey and Ruby Ribbon story. But unfortunately, I got in my own way and it hasn’t come to fruition. Yet. But I will get to it now that I am slowly righting myself and getting back on track. So please stay tuned for that post coming soon.

I am already a day late with this post and I was nearly ready to accept defeat and just say forget it. But again, not really in my nature. So I woke this morning with a new attitude and my mind halfway cleansed…enough to get back to what I love with my purpose and drive still in tact, no worse for the wear. I am sure I will continue to flounder in the next few weeks, especially as Summer break looms ahead knowing that I will need to be on and available for my kids all day long every day for 11 weeks, give or take the few that Gramma is having them stay with her. Thanks, Gramma, for saving my sanity!

So for today, I leave you with more snowy pictures of myself from Lake Placid from just a little over two weeks ago. And some quotes about floundering!

“Many people flounder about in life because they do not have a purpose, an objective toward which to work.” -George Halas

“The day is committed to error and floundering; success and achievement are matters of long range.” -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“Floundering around, learning by doing but also by failing, is not only good but inevitable.” -Duncan Green

“It must be hard for humans, forever floundering through inconvenient geography. Humans are always lost. It’s a basic characteristic. It explains a lot about them.”      -Terry Pratchett

“Without passion, all the skill in the world won’t lift you above craft. Without skill, all the passion in the world will leave you eager but floundering. Combining the two is the essence of the creative life.” -Twyla Tharp

Have you ever found yourself floundering?  How do you get yourself out of it?

And now the featured favorites from last week.

Lindsay of Small City Style shared her post, A casual Mom outfit! She looks amazing is this easy formula of skinny jeans, sweater, and utility jacket. Of course, when you add some fabulous shoes, you take a basic look up a level into the realm of fantastic.

Lindsay of Small City Style

Maria of Passion Fruit, Paws and Peonies shared her post, The Bell Inn New Forest REVIEW. Maria always shares some of the best places with the best food and the best scenery. I want her job!

Maria of Passion Fruit, Paws and Peonies


Keeping it on the edge,

Shelbee

Linking up with these Fabulous Link Ups.

I am a midlife woman, wife, and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.

74 Comments

  • Chrissy

    Oh goodness, gracious – yes! I have to take a step back and check my motives as well. Why am I doing “blank”? And then, I have to take it even further to…”But is that really why I’m doing blank?” For example, if I’m blogging just to get affirmations from my sweet blogger friends, looking for my value in shout outs, etc, then I’ve displaced placed my purpose and value. Of course at first I would say, “No, I’m not blogging for that.” But if I find myself checking emails, social media constantly and I feel disappointed and listless if nothing is there, that may be my indicator that I’m “off”. I hope I’m making sense here. I haven’t had too much time for my brain to wake up. haha. Then the floundering begins for me. Anyway, at that point I journal, pray, etc to get back to the source of my purpose, meaning and value. Ok, I better go get coffee and hope for an alert brain. You’re the best Shelbee. I thank God that I’ve met you through the blog world often and I’m sending up prayers this morning! By the way, I’m loving those duck boots with those distressed jeans. Too cute!

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Chrissy, thank you so, so, so much for this comment. I actually am feeling quite raw this morning and you brought me to tears with this. The good kind, of course. For that I am so grateful just as I am grateful for your blogger friendship. And that relatability that you offer to me and so many others. It is valuable and important to the world. I realize I have been selling myself short on some things, allowing too much noise to distract me on others. Now is the time to regain focus and purpose and redirect myself on the road that I am supposed to be traveling. I adore you so much and I thank you for the prayers! Now go enjoy some coffee, my friend. It is, after all, what makes the world go round, isn’t it?!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • anne the spygirl

    Aw, sorry that you’ve been in a funk.
    I’m taking a free online course that may be of some help on Makelight, called Pause for Thought.
    https://makelight.com/courses/pause-for-thought We’re in the 2nd week, but I think you can start any time.
    I get into funks every Fall. It took me a long time to figure out that it’s a cyclical thing and now I just tell everyone “I’m being a hermit”. (Of course, harder to be a hermit with kids, I imagine!)

    Love the Twyla quote. Gotta reread her book. But I lent it to someone. Dang.
    Big hugs! ((((((((((o))))))))))

  • Michele Morin

    The perky woman who leads the exercises in the video series I use for my workout says, “Failure is not in the falling down, but in the staying down.”
    Good for you that you’ve taken time to analyze your position on blogging and are showing up with these great pictures and your good thoughts.

  • Maria | passion fruit, paws and peonies

    You flounder away as much as you need Shelbee. At times I can be sure of one direction and within a week I’ve done a 180 and I’m doing the opposite! If we could see the direction we are going in all the time the road might get a bit boring anyway. Don’t you just love exploring the back alleys? I do hope you feel a bit more together soon though and reconnect with your peace and happiness. You wear your heart on your sleeve in your posts and that is very special to anyone wanting to connect with a real person and not an ‘image’ of one. Enjoy your brother-in-laws wedding and thank you whole-heartedly for featuring my post from last week – I appreciate it so much xxx

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Maria, thank you so very much for your kind words. I agree with you completely that there are some beautiful gems to be discovered in those back alleys that we sometimes get lost traveling. I am already feeling a bit more together and slowly reconnecting with my inner peace and happiness. I just needed the fog to clear a little so I could better find my way. And while I would never change a thing about how I wear my heart on my sleeve, I am the first to admit that a heart on your sleeve does not offer it very much protection. But the greater the risk, the greater reward, isn’t that what they say? And it was my pleasure to feature your fun post!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Lisa Richardson

    I’ll just say this, at least you are introspective enough to realize you are floundering. I think that’s my MO for life, “Fake it til you make it” and I don’t even realize I’m doing it! LOL. You are such a cutie and I can’t honestly wrap my brain around you being in snow only 2 short weeks ago, but can I say that street looks so DARLING! It’s like you stepped into some kind of story book. Keep on keepin’ on friend. (how many saying can I put into one comment🤪) XOXO

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Lisa, I love the sayings! Add as many as you’d like! And thank you so much for this comment. I sort of feel like I had been caught in a fog for quite some time and it is just now starting to clear. I just needed to get the heck out of my own way! Faking it all the way to the end, my friend, fumbling forward every darn step of the way!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Carrie @ Curly Crafty Mom

    I have cut back on my posts in the last few weeks, not because I want to… but, I’ve just been so gosh darn busy with the kids wrapping up the school year. I’m just doing my best! I am glad you got this post up, I would miss you in blogland if you stopped blogging! I totally get it, though. Love that green jacket!

    Carrie
    curlycraftymom.com

  • Jodie

    Sending you tons of hugs and love Shelbee. Gosh, I feel like you and I are on the same wavelength. I just went to a blogging conference and although it was great, it made me feel like a huge loser. Like I ought to give up and just move on. How is it that I’ve been doing this for so long, and still don’t have the numbers like others do??
    And I realize it’s not all about the metrics, but golly gee…wouldn’t it be nice to have some income from this thing that we put so many hours into?
    But…a new day, a new attitude, right??
    XOXO
    Jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Jodie, you have no idea how this comment is helping me! I would love to make an income off of this blog that I do put so much work into. I have been supplementing with some freelance stuff for skin care companies and I am realizing that both they and I have been undervaluing my worth and causing me unnecessary anxiety for a mere pittance. Pair that with my allowing fear to hold me back…and stuck in a funk I have been. Lots of things need changing from an internal standpoint for me! But we are in this together…supporting each other every step of the way. That is way more important than the numbers, my friend! Keep rocking! I love you!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Nancy Baten

    I’m so glad you didn’t decide to give blogging a break. I think a lot of women look forward to your posts as I am. Therefore I feel sad that you don’t feel good. Although I don’t know what floundering means. I think it means when one is not feeling mentally good. Not happy.

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Nancy, thank you so much! And yes, floundering means just that…like a mental struggle or feeling lost and confused. But I am gaining some clarity and reevaluating goals right now, so it is all good! No blogging break necessary. Other types of breaks may be in order, however, still deciding what needs to give!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Amanda

    I’m right there with you. I feel like I am constantly busy, but then I look back and don’t even know what I’ve been doing! Blogging is the same for me, it is a way to figure out what is going on in my head and my heart and respond to the things I read, observe and want to learn about. Sometimes, I feel like I’m just going through the motions though. Perhaps some soul searching is in my future. I love the quotes! And the outfit, you look on the edge 😉
    Thanks for hosting and sharing the not as glamorous moments of life when it’s hard just to keep going. Have a great week!

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Amanda, thanks so much for this and for relating to me! It is so good to know that we are not alone in this crazy life journey! I guess that is why we should blog…if we have a voice to share to help others relate and not feel so alone, then we should keep pushing through even when we feel uninspired. Sometimes going through the motions is enough to just keep going! I hope you do get some valuable soul searching done as well, my friend!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Theresa Campbell

    “Floundering around, learning by doing but also by failing, is not only good but inevitable.” This quote resonated with me. I have definitely been floundering recently. I didn’t realize exactly what I was doing until I read your post! At first I had a lot of guilt about it considering I was so used to the discipline(and hours) it took to run my business the last 15 years. But because I had reached the burnout point and was ready for a change I now realize floundering was what I had to give myself permission to do in order to make that change. It has allowed me the space to try new things and new ways of living.

    Theresa

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Theresa, while I am not happy that you have also been floundering, I am happy that my post was able to bring you to a clearer picture of what you were feeling. Isn’t it amazing how that happens? And this is why we write our blogs. To help other through the trials of every day living. And giving ourselves permission is so important. I had been struggling with that concept myself…giving myself permission to just stop for a moment, breathe, reevaluate, reconsider, and get back on track. While I am still right smack in the middle of that process, I have been gaining so much clarity over the past week since I have slowed down and looked at the greater picture. So here’s to floundering our way forward, my friend!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Laura, thank you so much! I am not giving it up at all. Just slowing it down for now while I regain a clearer perspective. I will be back on track in no time! And I really do hope you stick around this community as well as you would be greatly missed!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Miri

    WOW, I love the quote about floundering in life. It is so true. Having something that will give you a purpose is essential. Especially for women. I think we all need something that will keep our fire burning. 🙂
    XO
    Miri
    https://currentlywearing.com

  • Elsie

    I also find myself floundering. I just can’t seem to keep up. While I am sorry you are in the same boat, I do feel a tad better knowing I am not alone. I often consider quitting blogging. But like you said, it’s our outlet, something completely mine. It keeps me feeling like “me” when everything else is going to S***. Basically, I don’t have any answers either my friend. But let’s keep on reflecting on our feelings and encouraging each other through our low points! And on that note, Shelbee you are a superwoman! You are an incredible inspiration and role model to other bloggers. Do what works for you, even it that is being a tad late on a post or taking small breaks when needed! Thank you for sharing your candid thoughts with us!

    Elsie | http://www.polishedwhimsy.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Elsie, thank you so much for this! And I agree that while I don’t like that my friends are also floundering, it is a consolation knowing that I am not alone. This blogging community is so supportive and I realize how much I enjoy it and cherish how uplifting everyone is. I will keep on going for sure. Hopefully better and more focused than ever on my goals and my mission. I hope that you are able to also find some clarity for going forward. You are also so very inspirational that this community would suffer a loss if you had given up blogging as well. Keep on floundering forward, my friend!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Tianna

    super cute outfit! I love those jeans and boots!

    I know what you mean about feeling lost – it happens to everyone. The important thing is to give yourself rest, space, and time to reflect so you can process it all and do what’s best for you 🙂 xx

  • Cheryl Tucker

    There must be something in the air! I feel the same. Like I’m not myself but can’t figure out why. One day I’m up the next I’m down. One day I love blogging and the next I’m ready to give it up. I have worked so hard on it and I just seem to tread water. I have to keep telling myself I do this as a hobby and to not get caught up in being the world’s most famous blogger. Ha Ha! Hope you are feeling better! Maybe we need to start a support group. 🙂
    Cheryl
    http://www.northwestmountainliving.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      I hear you, Cheryl! I really might need a support group! I think I have identified a major source of my issues and I am working on cleaning it all up! Once I process a complete revamping of my own reality, I suspect I will be better than ever! Plus I go to the doctor on Tuesday about my hormone issues. So hopefully I will get some resolutions on that front as well! Keep on keeping on, my friend. I don’t even consider my blog a hobby or a job necessarily, but rather it is my platform to share and help and spread kindness around this crazy, crazy world. Hugs to you!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Maureen

    My son will be home for summer break too and I am bracing myself for that! So I am with you on this one. I really should invest in ear plugs! 😅 Life works in mysterious ways and it’s pretty crazy how it can all of the sudden pull you in all directions spreading yourself thin. I know when it gets busy around here I forget about myself and before you know it I am feeling a little crazy. I love to reflect whether it’d be previous events or even comments I have left on someone’s blog, call it weird but it gives me time to process and focus. In a way, perhaps being in a funk is allowing you to bring back the focus to yourself and give you some clarity?

    Maureen | http://www.littlemisscasual.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Maureen, thanks so much for offering me even more insight! It is so helpful to hear others’ struggles and experiences. There has been quite a lot of noise in my life lately that has been really throwing me off track. I am attempting to clear it all out and move on with a a brighter vision of what I want my life to look like. It feels good actually. After you get through the upheaval and start placing things back where you want them. All that considered, summer break is coming! Better stock up on wine and vodka!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Marie Moody aka XmasDolly

    No, no, no!!! Never give up blogging! Take a break if you must, but don’t give it up! Friends and true friends because they don’t have to come over, and they don’t have to call you and they don’t even have to lie to you. These are true friends. My blogging friends are always there for me. A shoulder to cry on, an ear to lend and time to give. Think about it… I’m right, right? If you need prayers.. omg! In abundance for sure! You’ll always find someone that likes what you do, say, want etc. Thanks for sharing… keep your chin up my new friend & thanks for sharing your wonderful pictures. Wow, SNOW??? I’m in shorts and I’m sweating because we just finished planting our vegetable garden!!! ~hehehe~ Have a great week my new friend!

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Marie, thank you so much for these wonderfully kind words! I am not giving up my blogging journey! I have made way too many amazing friends here who have all been so supportive and just plain old amazing. But I really could use some prayers right now…my soul does need a little healing. So I really appreciate that, my friend! And the snow has finally moved out…I hope…for the season!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Patrick Weseman

    I flounder all the time. Right now I am very much so. A lot of it is due to my work situation but I am changing that soon. Sometimes I just plod along and then things get better for me. It is the plodding that gets but it is necessary as it makes me better at things.

    Thanks for hosting and I hope that you have a wonderful week.

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Patrick, I hear you! At least when we are plodding along, we are still moving forward and forward is progress, right?! Thanks so much for sharing your floundering experience with me. It’s good to know that I am not alone! Have a fantastic day!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Emma, thanks for commenting! There definitely are not enough hours in the day and floundering sometimes takes too many of them! Ha. But if we keep floundering forward at least that is progress. A 6 week break sounds so completely do-able compared to 11 weeks. But grandparents to the rescue!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Cheryl, thank you so much for relating and for encouraging me! And now it is Friday morning and I have not started my Friday link up post yet. But I will get it done before the day ends, for sure. Have a great weekend, my friend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Nailil

    I love these photos – though I am a little in disbelief at the snow. It just SO hot in Texas, I figured snow days were over elsewhere. I am glad that you will not be taking a break – not a long one anyway. But completely think that small breaks are always needed. 😉

    Xx, Nailil
    http://thirtyminusone.com/

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Nailil, thanks so much! The snow is finally over and it has been in the 60’s and 70’s here which is perfect! But there was still snow just 2 weeks ago! I have been definitely giving myself much more relax time lately and it has been good. Have a great weekend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Nina

    Hang in there Dear Friend. All of this comes and goes, especially when you have little ones. Even without the little ones I get unexplainedlly off kilter—March was one of those times. I’m not sure exactly what it was but I was off, and had to fight to get things back “on”. Now the flow is back… so who knows? Anyway, we’re all here pulling for you! Hugs, nina

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Nina, thank you so much for these encouraging words! I have spent this past week in a bit of emotional turmoil as I have slowly been peeling back the layers of fog. And with each layer, I am finding more and more clarity in my purpose, my goals, my life. It is a process, for sure, but one that will have so many benefits on the other side. It is so helpful to know that I am not the only one to struggle through such a thing. I appreciate your friendship and support so much. Here’s to floundering our way forward!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Suzanne Smith

    Hi Shelbee! I too am floundering, but getting better. Every day I try to wake up and start fresh! Some days, obviously are better than others, but there is always tomorrow to “begin again”! Sending you love!

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Suzanne, thank you so much! I, too, am getting better and gaining more and more clarity with each day. Peeling away layers of fog and unnecessary noise has been so helpful this week. I am glad that you are finding your way out of the fog as well!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Thanks so much, Rachael! Things are clearing up quite nicely! And I am getting back on track just in time for a million and one things that need to be done. Have a wonderful weekend and I hope you, too, are getting back on track as well. We must be patient with ourselves and allow ourselves the time we need to get it back together.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Jennie

    Really cute winter look! I like the layers and your plaid shirt.

    Sorry to read you are floundering, but glad Gramma gave you a little break. When I find myself feeling just struggling I set myself just one tiny goal to meet. Usually once I actually pull myself up and force myself to start i gradually become a little more motivated. Sometimes it will be enough to jump start me and other times not, but at least I can feel OK about meeting my goal. I have recently been checking out some meditation apps and that has been helpful, as well.

    Have a wonderful weekend, friend!

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Jennie, thank you so much for these very valuable tips! I totally relate to the completing one small task at a time to at least feel like I have accomplished something. Sometimes that works, sometimes it doesn’t. But in any event, I suppose if we are floundering it is important to at least keep floundering in the direction we want to be heading! I definitely need to check out some meditation activities I think. Thanks for the suggestion! Have a wonderful weekend, my friend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Angie

    All I can say is that you look great while you’re floundering in the snow. Lol! I like your makeup here, and your outfit (especially the pendant…I guess I have a thing for long pendants. :D) Also, maybe it’s the weather that has many of us feeling gloomy. If that’s the case, it’ll warm up tomorrow and things will get sunny. Wishing you the best. Thanks for sharing, Angie
    http://www.yourtrueselfblog.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      Angie, thank you so much! I do love my long pendants, too. And now that the weather has finally turned to nice, I have been feeling a bit better, for sure. I hope you have the most fabulous day, my friend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Marilee Gramith

    I think it may be that we need to flounder. It’s healthy to be uncertain, and take time to reflect. Charging confidently through life day after day? Who can do that?? Feed your soul as needed.

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Shelbee on the Edge