Love Will Prevail and #SpreadTheKindness Link Up #15

Love will prevail. These are words I spoke last week and it really got me thinking about what that means exactly. I was chatting with another mom and I was complaining about how exhausted I am parenting alone for the past 3 months while my husband has been away. And she replied with equal complaints about how difficult it is parenting with a partner who is there in body but absent in every other way.

She went on to explain that maybe they were just in a rough patch and it would pass. They are 13 years into their relationship and 8 years into their marriage with two kids. They are a same sex couple who fought for their right to even be married and then had children via sperm donors. I share that information because I can only imagine that those two things alone can add a tremendous strain on a relationship as if relationships aren’t hard enough. I wasn’t sure how to respond to her, so I simply said “Love will prevail.” And she responded with “I hope so. I really hope so.”

As I drove away, I started thinking about the implications and the power that our words can have on other people. Did I just give her some sort of false hope? I don’t know any more details about the nature of their relationship other than what I just shared. What if the relationship is failing? Or did I give her the little bit of hope that she needed to hold on to  what is very possibly a strong relationship worth saving? I’m really not sure.

And as my thoughts went off on their accord as they often do, I started thinking about how that statement could be interpreted in so many different ways and mean so many different things. Love will prevail. It obviously has prevailed for them to this point. Through all the struggles they have already encountered.  They are still in it together 13 years later.  So love is prevailing.  In some form.

And love for whom? In any relationship that encounters problems, if the love between the two partners falters, can love for your children prevail and bring you back around to your good place? What about love for yourself? That is so important, too. In my experience, you can’t give your love adequately to another until you fully and completely love yourself. And what does loving yourself mean? Sometimes, it means leaving a bad relationship. Even when you still love your partner and you love children. You must love yourself first and foremost. If leaving is the outcome, isn’t that still love prevailing? And if staying is the decision, then shouldn’t the focus be on the love that you had in order to strengthen what was there at the beginning?  How exactly does love prevail?  It can happen in so many various ways.

I never finished discussing the topic with this woman. And I doubt she reads my blog (I don’t think she even knows that I write a blog). And I sure hope she would not be offended by my sharing this. But I also hope that she finds a way for love to prevail. In whatever way that she needs it to. Love is a powerful thing. And it can accomplish some amazing feats. So for anyone reading this, if you are having doubts in your life…think about what that statement may mean to you in your own personal context. Love will prevail. Some how, in in its own way, I really do believe this is true.

What about you? Has your love made it through the toughest of times? Can love prevail?

Outfit Details
Dress: Xhilaration Wrap Midi Dress for Target.
Cardigan: Old Navy Long Open Front Cardi.
Jeans: Old Navy (Old).
Shoes: Target (Similar here).
Necklace: Burlington Coat Factory (Similar here).
Earrings: Shelbee’s Shoppe.

And a very Happy 4th Birthday to this little guy today! He torments me something fierce! But love definitely prevails!

Let love prevail and keep #SpreadingTheKindness. Here are your favorite posts from last week’s link up.

Over 50 Under 20 shared a fun post on Shopping The Clearance Racks 2. I love a great bargain so this was super fun to see all the deals she grabbed up on clearance!

And In My Prime Time shared some beautiful blush pieces for Spring as well as a gorgeous pair of handmade earrings.

Thanks to everyone who joins my link up every week! Keep spreading your kindness and happy linking!


Keeping it on the edge,

Shelbee

Linking up with these Fabulous Link Ups

Follow shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com:

I am a 40 something Army wife and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats named Dave and Frankie. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.

66 Responses

  1. I loved reading this post! I think love van survive a hole lot…But both partners have to be commited. Gerben and I are this year 25years together and it s only getting easier. The first years were the difficult ones!

    • Nancy, thank you so much for your kind words and your encouraging words. Love really can survive a ton. And I know each situation is different…but if you keep love alive…somehow, things will work out.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  2. Happy birthday to your little man xx And who doesn’t love a floaty dress! Gorgeous Shelbee xx
    http://www.vanityandmestyle.com

  3. You make such good points. In some way, love will prevail. Every marriage goes through rough patches and as long as you both remember why you got married in the first place and work hard, you can get back to a good place. You look beautiful in that dress by the way.

  4. WOW what a deep post, Shelbee! I think those words you said couldn’t have been more apt. It is love that usually prevails – if we really want it to.
    Suzy xx
    http://www.suzyturner.com

  5. I do think you are right in saying love will prevail. Because if we truly love one another, it will! It means we will weather the storm and put other’s needs before us!
    You are such a kind soul Shelbee!
    jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

  6. love will prevail but that does not mean that something will not end. Maybe their love for their children will strengthen their bond or they will realize that the environment is not good for the children. Best we can hope for always is that common sense and a love for others will prevail and the children will be first no matter what.

    Thanks for sharing and you have as much snow as us, so tired of it.

    • Linda, thank you so much for your perspective on love! And I agree with you totally…sometimes even with love, things must come to an end. And without much love at all for this snow that is sticking around…I hope that it (the snow) comes to an end! And soon!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  7. Awesome point of view Shelbee! Love that dress too!

    Come drop by my blog for my latest collaboration with Los Angeles-based indie brand BACIANO and let me know what you think!

    Happy Spring!

    Rebecca
    http://www.redtagchiclosangeles.com

  8. Yes yes yes. I can attest at this “wonderful” 13 years of marriage mark for me as well, that life gets tough and unpredictable but love will/can prevail 🙂 Thanks for always reminding me of that. I might add that I am learning that along with love, throw in some fun and music and dance. Sometimes we forget how good it feels to laugh or to be goofy or to let go a little bit. That combo, and life is good!!!!!

    And you and that dress are fabulous!

  9. I think love can prevail if you work hard enough. Some people give up as soon as things get tough and never make the effort. P.s LOVE that color on you!

    • Stephanie, thank you for sharing your thoughts on the topic! And I agree…if you give up too soon, you may very miss the best parts of the entire journey! (And, isn’t this color just amazing?!)

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  10. Thanks for another thought provoking post.
    I just had a meet-up with one of my BFF artist friends and we had so many laughs.
    Love for your partner, love for your friends, and love for yourself.
    Better a circle of love than a quagmire of indifference.

    • YES, Anne, YES! I am screaming it at the top of voice (inside my head, of course, because I don’t want people to know I’m crazy…they can think it, but I don’t need to prove it!) “Better a circle of love than a quagmire of indifference.” My favorite phrase in the English language to date! Thank you.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  11. I think it does. It has to because love is one of things that makes us go. Thanks for hosting and have a wonderful rest of the week.

    • Patrick, thank you so much for this lovely comment! I never thought of it like that…but I agree. Love is one of the things that makes us go. I suppose if we loved nothing and no one, we would just stop being.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  12. Aww happy 4th birthday to him! And I loved reading your post today. So true and so good to hear!

  13. I think its so important to stop and think what we say to others and how they may feel about it, because too often we just don’t. I think you said just what she needed to hear 🙂

  14. This is such a great post Shelbee. Love will prevail, I’m a firm believer in that! I think you’re spot on in saying that whether it be love for yourself or love your relationship, etc. love prevails. But, I think your positive words for her were a great thing, words are powerful and think if you said something negative how that could feed into her negative feelings.

    Brooke
    Pumps and Push-Ups

    • Brooke, thank you so much for this wonderful and thoughtful comment! Oh, the power of words. I wrote an entire post about that a while back. Our words and the impact they have on others goes far beyond our comprehension. So I always try to be kind and encouraging and empowering and real with my words! I wish the rest of the world could follow the example of this amazing community of bloggers!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  15. Very thought provoking post Shelbee. I do believe wholly in loving oneself and only then can we pour our love out to others.

    • Shelly, thank you for this lovely comment! I think once we get to a place of sincere and genuine self-love, we are so much better equipped to become loving and caring individuals! I agree with you completely.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  16. love your super flowy dress this week! Super flattering and you look lovely!

  17. What a great post. Love and just making the choice to love has gotten us through a lot in our relationship!

  18. love the dress and that necklace is FABULOUS!

    Life is just Rosie
    Instagram

  19. Love can and will prevail as long as you believe in its power and in yourself. Sometimes, that means leaving relationships that are harmful to your soul. Many years ago I found the courage to leave an abusive relationship. For years I had been beaten down by a man who told me on a daily basis, among other things, that I was worthless, disgusting, stupid, a loser, you name it, I heard it. I was paralyzed by fear and yet deep in my heart I knew the words he spoke to me were not true. Faith and family got my through and I am here to tell you that, yes, love does prevail. I’ve been happily married to the love of my life for almost 12 years. I am blessed beyond measure.

    Hopefully the woman you spoke with at school will take stock of her soul and the quality of her life and relationship and do what she needs to do to get her life back on track. Great post, Shelbee! And so glad I discovered you linkup!

    Have a great week!

    Mary
    http://marymurnane.com

    • Mary, thank you so very much for sharing your story here. I have been in my share of bad relationships where I had to rediscover myself and my worth and my strength. And in those situations I eventually learned to love myself first and foremost. That self-love most certainly prevailed and it brought me to a place where I could love others fully and unconditionally. And happiness beyond my wildest dreams came into my life. I think sharing these stories is so important to help others to know they are not alone. And what a fabulous way to #SpreadTheKindness. Thank you again. Thank you so very much. And I am so glad that you found your happy ending as well!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  20. This is such a good message and I love that you shared this story. Marriage can be hard but loving yourself first and figuring out the love between two people and kids can be hard throughout the years but it’s so important.

    I love this dress too!

    Kileen
    cute & little

    • Kileen, thank you so much for this amazingly thoughtful comment. Oh, I didn’t even get into the kid thing in this post! My goodness, they do change everything, don’t they?

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  21. Love your powerful thoughts here Shelbee! Love will prevail and my life it a testament to that. You gave her the words she needed to hear. Love this gorgeous maxi dress! The color is beautiful on you.

    http://www.kathrineeldridge.com

  22. Commitment and trust are very important to enduring love and as well as recognizing that it will evolve and change. This is true for a partner as well as a child. Relationships, and what we need from them, will grow over time. Wanting to stay in past will only hurt the relationship as it adapts to new challenges and experiences. Thanks for prompting this thought provoking conversation.

    Rena
    http://www.finewhateverblog.com

    • Rena, thank you so very much for your very heartfelt response. I appreciate all of the wonderful responses I am getting to this post. Clearly, it is an issue that we all have struggled with in some way.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  23. This dress is so pretty on you, I love how it is sheer on the bottom and the double tassel necklace is adorable, too! Relationships can be so hard… and there are def. rough patches. I hope this lady can find what is missing in her partner, maybe they need to have a weekend alone or a long talk.

    Carrie
    curlycraftymom.com

  24. I love that dress on you! Hoping the snow melts soon for ya!

  25. It may and it may not, it depends on how much each partners works at it and how bad they want to keep it together and tough through it. Persistence is key. I say this because I went through it. Thanks for sharing. Would love if you can drop by http://the-wardrobe-stylist.com/2017/03/20/frugal-diy-easter-decorating-ideas/

  26. Reading this I immediately thought of my next door neighbour. She’s 95 and lost her husband in October – they had been married almost 71 years. When he was alive she used to tell me that the key to staying together for so long was simple – “just love each other” was her advice for a long and happy marriage. She misses him terribly and sleeps with his sweater every night but remains upbeat. Having so many happy memories is a source of comfort for her. Love did and still does prevail.

    Emma xxx
    http://www.style-splash.com

    • Oh wow, Emma! What a fabulous story. I guess through the tough times if you keep holding onto the love, you can make it through. 71 years of marriage?! Can you even imagine? The loss for her must be so tremendous after all those years of having him by her side. That really is a true love story. Thanks so much for sharing it.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  27. It is great to hear your musings. Love is a wonderful thing, but it also takes commitment, hard work, creativity, and support. Sometimes, it also takes help via counseling or mediation. Your outfit is very cute and so is your son. Happy birthday to him. Thanks for sharing. – Amy
    http://stylingrannymama.com/

  28. That is such a beautiful dress Shelbee! I think that your advice was wise; love will prevail whether it be the love between the two of them or the love of self that it will take to perhaps move on. All relationships have issues and sometimes love is enough. Other times it isn’t and that’s okay too.
    Debbie
    http://www.fashionfairydust.com

    • Debbie, thank you so much for this beautiful comment. I love this part…”sometimes love is enough. Other times it isn’t and that’s okay too.” There is so much truth in those words.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  29. Lovely post, Shelbee. Sometimes things get hard and if it is meant to be love will get though it.

    Love your dress, wow you have a lot of snow!! Thanks for stopping by The Wednesday blog hop 🙂

    • Claire, thank you so much for your thoughtful comment! And yes we do have a lot of snow! But there is warmer weather in the near future with rain, so hopefully the snow will wash away and Spring will arrive!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  30. Such a great message. I do think it’s important to remember in tough times as guidance.

    Annessa
    http://www.seekingsunshine.com

  31. Thanks for linking up to the Top of the World Style party. I like how you “winterized” this dress.

  32. Yes to love prevailing .. and happy bday to your lil dude. Gorgeous dress!

    OXOX
    Dawn Lucy
    http://fashionshouldbefun.com

  33. Relationships are not easy and you have to work hard at them. If you do that, I think love will prevail! Happy Birthday to your little guy! Love your pretty dress!

    Jill
    Doused In Pink

    • Jill, thank you so much for this kind comment! Relationships really are difficult. I think when you lose sight of the love that started it all is when you may be in big trouble.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

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